Business funny Jokes

Question and answer

Definition: A manager is a person who thinks that nine women can produce a child in one month.

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Robots: Our Steel Collar Workers.

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Q: What's the difference between Xerox and the Titanic?

A: The Titanic had a band.

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Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time?

A: A dependent Claus.

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Q: What do you call a credit union volunteer in a room full of bank directors?

A: A superior being.

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Q: What is the difference between big foot and a socially responsible banker?

A: Big foot has been sighted.

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Q: Why did the bank drive-up window teller have tire tread marks across the back of his grey suit?

A: From crawling across the street when the sign said: "Don't Walk."

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Q: How do you confuse a bank teller?

A: Give him a bag of M&M's and tell him to alphabetize them.

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Q: Why is a BMW a banker's favorite car?

A: Because he can't spell Porsche.

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Anti-trust laws should be approached with exactly that attitude

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If bankers can count, how come the average bank has 10 windows and only four tellers?

Lost in a balloon

Two hobbyists get into their balloon for an excursion. After a while, the wind unexpectedly picks up, and the balloon goes out of control. The two balloonists, with great effort, manage to keep the balloon stable, upright, and away from power lines. But they are lost. With more effort, they get the balloon near the ground. While floating over a country road, they see a man walking below. One of the balloonists calls down to him:

"We're lost! Can you tell us where we are?"

The man thinks for a while, looks down, looks up, looks down again, stares into space for a minute, and then cries out:

"You're in a balloon!"

The wind picks up, and the balloon floats off. After a moment, one balloonist says to the other:

"That man must be a manager."

"Why?"

"Three reasons. First, he took a long time to answer. Second, he was perfectly correct. Third, his answer was perfectly useless!"

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