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    Purchasing new brains

    A mid-level executive was so frustrated at being passed over for promotion year after year, that, in frustration, he went to a brain-transplant center in the hope of raising his I.Q. 20 points.

    After a battery of physical and psychological tests, he was told by the center's director that he was an acceptable candidate.

    "That's great!" the executive said. "But I understand that this procedure can be really expensive."

    "Yes, sir, it can," the director replied. "An ounce of accountant's brain for example, costs one thousand dollars; an ounce of an economist's brain costs two thousand; an ounce of a corporate president's is forty-five thousand. An ounce of a Democrat's brain is seventy-five thousand dollars."

    "Seventy-five thousand dollars for an ounce of a Democrat's brain? Why on earth is that?"

    "Do you have any idea," the director asked, "how many Democrats we would have to kill?"

    Short laughs & quips

    Lots of folks are forced to skimp to support a government that won't.

    There's one thing the Democrats and Republicans share in common: Our money.

    ...Veni, Vedi, Clinti--I came, I saw, I lied.

    A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with 'Once Upon A Time'?"

    He replied, "No, there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin with 'If elected I promise'."

    Next page

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