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    Piloting your plane

    An F-111 was flying escort with a B-52 and generally making a nuisance of himself by flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber.

    The message for the B-52 crew was, "Anything you can do, I can do better."

    Not to be outdone, the bomber pilot announced that he would rise to the challenge.

    The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level, however.

    Perplexed, the fighter pilot asked, "So? What did you do?"

    "We just shut down two engines."

    Misunderstanding terms

    One reason the Services have trouble operating jointly is that they don't speak the same language.

    For example, if you told Navy personnel to "secure a building," they would turn off the lights and lock the doors.

    Army personnel would occupy the building so no one could enter.

    Marines would assault the building, capture it, and defend it with suppressive fire and close combat.

    The Air Force, on the other hand, would take out a three-year lease with an option to buy.

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