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    Cropp's Law: The amount of work done varies inversely with the amount of time spent in the office.

    Bo Diddeley's Observation On The Law: Always take a lawyer with you, and bring another lawyer to watch him.

    Bolub's Fourth Law of Computerdom: Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress.

    Deadline-Dan's Demo Demonstration: The higher the "higher-ups" are who've come to see your demo, the lower your chances are of giving a successful one.

    Demian's Observation: There is always one item on the screen menu that is mislabeled and should read "Abandon hope all ye who enter here".

    DeVries's Dilemma: If you hit two keys on the typewriter, the one you don't want hits the paper.

    Dr. Caligari's Comeback: A bad sector disk error occurs only after you've done several hours of work without performing a backup.

    Hugh Downs' Four Rules for Investigating the Universe: Rule 1 - When confronted with an apparent infinite or infinitely repeating pattern, expect some variant that keeps it from being infinite. Rule 2 - When all investigation supports Rule 1, look for a situation which violates it. Rule 3 - Be prepared for an infinite oscillation between Rules 1 and 2. Rule 4 - Apply Rule 1.

    Drew's Law of Highway Biology: The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.

    Ducharme's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.

    Ducharme's Precept: Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.

    Emersons' Law of Contrariness: Our chief want in life is somebody who shall make us do what we can. Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.

    Estridge's Law: No matter how large and standardized the marketplace is, IBM can redefine it.

    Fett's Law: Never replicate a successful experiment.

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