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    Paying in advance

    A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth.

    "Oh, about $200 today," said the rancher. "But in six years it would have been worth $900. So $900 is what I'm out."

    The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer.

    "Here," he said, "is the check for $900. It's postdated six years from now."

    Bad Japanese economy

    According to inside contacts, the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it's getting worse.

    Following last week's news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up, and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and it is (you guessed it!) going for a song.

    Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived, and 500 back-office staff at Karate Bank got the chop. Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank, and staff there fear they may get a raw deal.

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